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Can money buy love? The two sides of Valentine’s

A couple celebrating Valentine's Day at a restaurant. 

A couple celebrating Valentine's Day at a restaurant. 

Photo credit: | Shutterstock

What you need to know:

  • Alas! It’s that time of the year again when a whimsical rebellion against the tidal wave of commercialism sweeps our lands with the message that consumerism is threatening to drown the true essence of romance in a sea of heart-shaped trinkets and overpriced chocolates. Instead of bowing to the societal pressure of splashy gifts and grand gestures, this movement invites us to question the need for such material extravagance. Can love, really, thrive without all these red roses and dresses and chocolate and expensive dinners?

As February unfolds, so does the annual flurry of heart-shaped candies, saccharine cards, and the ubiquitous red roses that signal the impending arrival of Valentine’s Day.

Yet, in the midst of Cupid’s orchestrated symphony, a growing chorus of dissent is singing a different tune – the Anti-Valentine’s Day movement.

While some may dismiss it as a trendy rebellion of the modern era, a closer look reveals that this charming revolt against all things mushy has deeper roots than one might think.

The story of Valentine’s Day’s transformation from a simple celebration of love to a commercial extravaganza begins in the early 20th century. Back in the innocent days of yore, around the early 1900s, Cupid’s holiday was a simpler affair. Lovebirds exchanged heartfelt notes and perhaps a modest token of affection. But then, societal norms did a little cha-cha, and consumerism waltzed right in, ready to turn Cupid into a cash cow.

Enter the greeting card industry, stage left, in the 1920s. Capitalising on the new-found commercial potential of Valentine’s Day, they flooded the market with mass-produced sentiments, transforming the art of expressing love into a profitable enterprise. Suddenly, one couldn’t profess affection without a pre-printed declaration of love.

Not to be outdone, chocolatiers joined the romantic revolution. In the 1930s, they wrapped their delectable delights in heart-shaped boxes adorned with cherubs and roses. Because, really, nothing says “I love you” like a decadent piece of chocolate nestled in packaging straight out of a Renaissance painting.

Flowers, especially the ruby-red rose, soon found themselves at the forefront of this love-fuelled marketing spree. Thanks to clever campaigns in the 1940s, roses became the symbol of love.

So here we are, living in a world where Valentine’s Day has evolved from a humble expression of love into a grandiose commercial spectacle.

Statistics paint a vivid picture of the commercial behemoth that Valentine’s Day has become. Sender.net reports that the average spending on Valentine’s Day in the United States skyrocketed to an eye-watering $27.4 billion in 2023. This staggering figure encompasses not only traditional gifts like flowers and chocolates but also an array of unconventional presents and experiences, all marketed under the guise of expressing love.

Picture this: in 2015, rapper Kanye West decided to shower his wife, Kim Kardashian, with a Valentine’s Day gift that most mortals can only dream of — a whopping $1 million worth of roses! Apparently, a simple bouquet just wouldn’t cut it for the power couple. Not to be outdone, in 2014, basketball legend LeBron James dropped a jaw-dropping $10,000 on a bouquet of flowers for his wife, Savannah Brinson. That’s not just roses; that’s roses dipped in gold and sprinkled with championship stardust.

And then there’s the tale of billionaire Elon Musk, who, in 2018, spent a cosmic $487,000 on a one-of-a-kind ruby pendant for his then-girlfriend, Amber Heard. Rumour has it that the pendant was crafted from a meteorite.

But wait, there’s more! In 2012, rapper Jay-Z decided to gift his wife, Beyoncé, a $5 million platinum-wrapped Bugatti Veyron Grand Sport. Nothing says “I love you” like a luxury car with a top speed of over 250 mph. Practical? Perhaps not. Extravagant? Absolutely.

These tales may sound like the stuff of celebrity lore, but they highlight the outlandish lengths to which some will go to celebrate Valentine’s Day. However, beneath the surface of this consumer-driven frenzy lies a growing discontent with the commodification of love. Insider Intelligence’s Valentine’s Day Trends for 2024 report sheds light on the shifting dynamics of relationships. It reveals that 45 percent of respondents believe that extravagant gifts do not equate to true love.

Valentine's Day

Florists packing flowers for sale in Nakuru City during Valentine's Day on February 14, 2024.

Photo credit: Boniface Mwangi | Nation Media Group

Enter the Anti-Valentine’s Day movement — a whimsical rebellion against the tidal wave of commercialism that sweeps in each February.

The movement shines a spotlight on the fact that the depth of our connections and personal well-being should triumph over superficial displays of affection.

So, what’s driving this Anti-Valentine’s Day sentiment? Indulge me if you will. In the ongoing saga of Valentine’s Day, additional surveys appear to corroborate the ever-evolving sentiments swirling around this heart-shaped day. Take, for instance, the delightful findings from YouGov, where a modest 32 percent of savvy individuals strategically sidestep Valentine’s Day festivities, citing its commercial hustle as the prime culprit.

Meanwhile, the rebels surveyed by Eventbrite and SurveyMonkey boldly expressed their desire to liberate themselves from the shackles of societal norms tied to Valentine’s Day. Instead, they opt for a celebration of independence and individuality, showcasing a knack for turning Cupid’s arrow into a boomerang of self-love.

These surveys, aside from providing a quirky compass for companies navigating the tumultuous landscape of love, also serve as a megaphone for those cunningly avoiding the glittering facade of heart-shaped consumerism.

Valentine’s Day rebels unite!

Now, if you are looking to fly your “situationship” flag high this Valentine’s Day and flip cupid the bird, allow me to share some insights on how folks are giving a cheeky nod to singledom and complicated “entanglements”:

The Solo Soirée: Forget romantic dinners for two! The trendiest Anti-Valentine celebrations involve a table for one. Solo soirées are all about treating yourself to a lavish spread, no need for awkward small talk or compromising on pizza toppings.

DIY Romance: Why wait for someone else to sweep you off your feet when you can DIY your own romance? Trends are revealing a surge in people crafting their version of love stories. Whether it’s handwritten letters to themselves or creating a shrine dedicated to self-love. One is only limited by one’s imagination.

Un-Valentine’s Day Cards: Anti-Valentine’s Day enthusiasts are spreading cheer with cards that ditch the sugary sentiments. Think witty one-liners like “Roses are red, violets are blue, I like you, but labels? Ehh, let’s not do.”

Galentine’s Get-Together: Who needs a significant other when you’ve got your squad? Anti-Valentine’s Day is the perfect excuse for a Galentine’s get-together. Whether it’s binging on movies, sharing anti-romance memes, or indulging in heartbreak karaoke, these gatherings celebrate friendship over fleeting romances.

“It’s Complicated” Movie Marathons: Rom-coms are out; ‘It’s Complicated’ movie marathons are in. Anti-Valentine’s aficionados are revelling in films that mirror the intricacies of modern relationships, reminding everyone that love doesn’t always fit into a neat little box.

Snarky Slogan Swag: Embracing the humour in heartbreak, some rebels are sporting Anti-Valentine’s Day merchandise. Think snarky slogans, heartbreak emojis, and t-shirts that say, “Cupid, who?” It’s a fashion statement and a mood all in one.

Self-Love Spa Days: The rise of self-love isn’t just a trend; it’s a movement. Anti-Valentine’s celebrants are treating themselves to spa days, solo adventures, and shamelessly indulgent self-care rituals. Because who needs a significant other when you’ve got the glorious company of yourself?

So, let’s cut to the ‘heart’ of the matter — the Anti-Valentine’s Day movement isn’t about slamming the door on love or ditching romantic rendezvous. No, no, it’s more like a collective eye-roll at the commercial circus that’s hijacked the day of love. Think of it as a love revolt against the pressure to turn emotions into expensive purchases.

Why the skepticism? Peek at the stats, and you’ll see the numbers high-fiving the sceptics. Around 60 percent of folks aren’t exactly thrilled about the commercial charade that’s become synonymous with Valentine’s Day.

Now, whether you’re dancing in the rain of heart confetti or cozying up with fellow anti-hearts, remember this; love is everywhere, and it’s definitely not up for sale. So, this Valentine’s Day, let’s celebrate love in all its forms — whether it’s wrapped in red ribbons or sprinkled with a healthy dose of skepticism. Cheers to love, laughter, and staying true to your heart — no price tag required!