What if Adam had eaten these four things…
Before the fall in the Garden of Eden, every herb was legal; except eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.
Creativity can be a blessing and a curse. Sometimes the creative bug bites deeply, and I think about deep things. Things that can be considered sacrilegous. Fortunately, my Creator - who gave me this creative gift - understands and forgives.
The other day, I was thinking about some things Adam would've eaten instead of the fruit. Hey, religious folks, I pray you'll understand me. And, while you're at it, forgive me.
Jaba
Before the fall in the Garden of Eden, every herb was legal; except eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.
Imagine if Adam was a real murume. He would eat jaba and give the serpent stories for millennia and frustrate his plans. Besides, because Adam Murume's mouth would already be full with that green slimy ball - which avid jaba chewers never spit out - he would not eat the fruit.
You know what? Adam Murume would not give the serpent story za jaba. Instead, they would be stories za Jah-Jah.
Serpent: “Did God really say that?”
Adam Murume, chewing jaba like his everlasting life and ours depends on it: “Let me tell you something about Jah-Jah …”
And, like all jaba chewers, Adam Murume would drone on, ad infinitum, until the cool of the day when Jah-Jah came for their daily powwow.
Jaba was all it would've taken to avoid the fall. Imagine that.
Takeaway: Man, if ever you're faced with the temptation to sin or commit a crime, do everything legal to overcome it.
Vako
In Sheng, vako means to cheat. Kula vako - which is directly translated to, “eat vako” - means to ignore. It also means to pretend like something or someone doesn't exist. Kula vako can also mean, “wait here, I'll be back in a little bit”.
Man, if only Adam had pretended like the serpent didn't exist. If only he had taken a long work trip to the other side of the world to name animals and told the serpent - “wait here, I'll be back in a little bit” - too much waiting would've, as the Swahili adage goes, hurt the deceiver's stomach.
Takeaway: Bro, when temptations come, kula vako. A man's got to do what a man's got to do.
The wind
Men don't like eating the wind. But the flip side is, if we refuse to eat the wind, we often reap a whirlwind.
Eating the wind is hard. Why, it means we must also eat a side dish of pride with the wind. And, for a cold dessert, wolf down a plate of chilled ego.
Takeaway 1: To eat the wind means to take a walk. It means to show a clean pair of heels.
Imagine if Adam would've taken a 1,000-year walk.
Takeaway 2: Bro, when you are in a sticky situation and your sixth sense sounds warning alarms, heed it. Don't rationalise. Take a walk before things ugly. Or else you might fall.
The serpent's lunch
Yeah. The serpent had lunch. Read in between the lines of scripture. Do some thorough exegesis. The serpent came with lunch, which he first offered Eve.
The Greek name of this deceptively sumptuous lunch the serpent came with is apaté.
Here's the thing. The serpent doesn't come empty-handed. He knows that mkono mtupu haulambwi. That is, if his hand doesn't have honey, which is laced with cyanide, you will not lick it. The honey draws you in for the kill.
Takeaway 1: To eat someone's lunch means to defeat them, to beat them thoroughly, or make short work of them.
Takeaway 2. The word apaté means deception.
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