Coming to oneself means coming to one’s senses. It means to gain self-control or consciousness. It means to wake up and smell the coffee. Coming to oneself means being jolted to your senses when a good pile of number two hits the fan.
Men lose control in different ways. For some, the process is fast and furious, like a swooping eagle descending on an unaware prey.
For others, the process is slow and gradual. For instance, a man may believe he is in control, slowly paddling along the river of life until a waterfall suddenly comes within sight and the momentum he has gathered leads to a mighty fall.
A perfect example of a man who came to himself in the nick of time was the prodigal son, in one of Jesus Christ’s famous parables.
When a man comes to himself, he takes responsibility for what's happening in his life. He becomes the bigger man. And once he does this, he stops passing the buck.
He doesn't blame the pigs for messing up his life and living quarters. He doesn’t blame his parents for real or perceived indiscretions. He doesn't blame a disability or demons. And certainly, he doesn't blame God. He takes it on the chin.
Taking responsibility means accepting accountability for the role you played, either through omission or commission, which got you into the mess you are in. It means taking off your rose-tinted glasses and seeing yourself for who you really are.
Taking responsibility doesn't mean you're a bad man, though; it only means you made bad decisions.
When a man comes to himself, he will do whatever it takes to get help. He will gather what’s left of his guts, get up from the KO life has given him and walk all the way home … or wherever he can get help.
This type of man is not carried to safety by other men; he is carried by his honest need to get help and turn around his life.
When a man comes to himself, he will swallow his pride. He won't mind if lesser folks see his dire situation. Like the prodigal son, he will not care if his father's servants - whom, in a previous life, perceived him as their master - now see him humbled by life. The only thing he will care about is being given a chance to do better, even if he will start from a lowly position.
When a man does not come to himself, he will live a life of denial and blame. He will blame others for his predicament. He will be blinded by entitlement and bitterness - baying for heroes and saviours - to an extent that he won’t perceive he's the chief protagonist-cum-problem in the story of his life.
When a man does not come to himself, he will eternally dine with pigs; whereas he was born to break bread with royalty.
We are supposed to live and die with dignity. When a man does not come to himself, he will die with pigs, whereas he was destined to transition as a prince.
Men frequently put aside their dignity and pride to rescue a brother who’s caught up in a pigsty. But it's only when a man comes to himself that he will be absolutely sure he won't return to the pigsty with the new clean clothes he's been blessed with.
It’s only when a man comes to himself that he can make productive use of the lifeline he's been thrown countless times. Otherwise, the help will always be an exercise in futility. Which will cause his helpers extreme frustration and fatigue.
It’s only when a man comes to himself that he can offer genuine apologies and promise to do better. If genuine contrition does not happen, then he is only trying to finagle folks who are helping him. He is playing with their emotions and resources and turning them into enablers.
