Here are my bold, audacious plans for the new year
I want to submit here that all that I went through in 2024 was meant to prepare me for greater things in 2025.
What you need to know:
- In 2024, Fiolina left me, but only for a short time, as she realised that I was the best thing ever since sliced bread.
- On a more positive note, 2024 was the first time I left the country, and I did not just leave; I flew out in a jumbo jet.
I do not know about you, but my 2024 was a bag of mixed fortunes. It was the year I almost died, thanks to Apostle Elkana, Spiritual Superintendent of The Holiest of All Ghosts (THOAG) Tabernacle Assembly.
The good Apostle took me for a ‘spiritual sojourn’ that incapacitated me for a few months - making me almost lose my job. As a result, Fiolina also left me, but only for a short time, as she realised that I was the best thing ever since sliced bread.
Kuya, the man who has caused me enough trouble, is out of Mwisho wa Lami, having been transferred to a tiny, far-flung school that just recently started. He hasn't been made an HOI as he thought.
On a more positive note, 2024 was the first time I left the country, and I did not just leave; I flew out in a jumbo jet, not the small things that take people to Mombasa, those are toys. I may have been illegally deported from Ethiopia for being too handsome and wanted by many ladies there, but that will not take away the fact that I flew out of the country.
Going by my experiences last year, 2025 is going to be my year. As the Bible says, God does not give you what you cannot handle; I want to submit here that all that I went through in 2024 was meant to prepare me for greater things in 2025. And I am ready!
The first thing I am going to do in 2025 is go to court to sue the Ethiopian Government for illegally deporting me. And I will be going to the ICC, no less. I am looking for contacts of some of the best legal minds in Kenya and have zeroed in on Elisha Zebedee Ongayo, Nelson Havi, Cliff Ombetta, and Danstan Omari. I will not select one of them, but they will all form part of my dream legal team.
The greatest lesson I gathered is that I don't need to give them any money; all we need to agree on is the percentage they will take from what I will be paid – which I am told will be quite a tidy sum. So if anyone has the contacts of any of them, please send them to me. If all goes well, you too, will get something.
Once I am compensated by the Ethiopian Government, there are many things I plan to do with the money. The first one will be to remember the people of Kumba village, the village that gave birth to Fiolina, the lucky laugh of my envious life. If you remember, before our dream wedding in 2013, I visited the family for dowry negotiations. I paid a deposit and was to clear what remained in two instalments. This year, I plan to give her people more cows, a goat, and some money.
But for that to happen, Fiolina must also play her part. And it's not just about being of good behaviour and being a good wife – she already is. It's about results. She must show results by giving Sospeter a sister, not a brother. If she behaves before November, we can set Saturday, December 27, as the day when I will visit her family with goodies.
And no, I am not just depending on compensation money from Ethiopia. After all, they may pay me in Birr, whose value is nothing really. I have so many other sources of money. Or rather, I will have so many sources of money by the end of the year.
As you know, although God blessed me with many things, he forgot to give me a business mind. But I have been learning. Business is not necessarily buying and selling something; it can also be using your brains. For example, the NGO that my brother started to support education in rural areas is a business. He makes some good money from it, despite being clueless on matters of pedagogy.
What am I saying? I am saying that this year, I am going to register an NGO that will transform education in rural communities, starting with transforming my life – since, as they say, charity begins at home. I have done some research and learned that I can register a CBO, a Trust, an NGO, or a foundation. It's all the same – you get money from donors worldwide, use it to develop yourself, and what remains you give to people.
Things between me and Smiffy, Pius’ Sponsor, may have gone bad, but Smiffy is not the only potential sponsor. Many other clueless white people will be ready to sponsor me – and the NGO I will create.
And if all goes well with the NGO, it will be another opportunity to leave Kenya again. But this time, I will leave Africa. I realized Kenyans don't know our potential. The pedagogy lectures I gave in Addis Ababa, Debre Birhan, Adama, name it, were very well received, with people clapping throughout. I will not let this brand go to waste. Whether it will be Beirut or East Timor, whether it will be Brunei or Andorra, this year, I must travel out of Africa.
For the last few months, I have not stepped into school – as a head. While I am keen to get back to work, I have learned that there is life outside the school. And it's actually a good life. Yes, I have yearned to get back to school, but at the same time, I am committed that this will be my last year as a teacher. An HM or HOI is just a glorified teacher.
So by the end of this year, I will not be in school. There are many positions at the TSC, KICD, and even the Ministry of Education that I can take up, but I could also be headhunted by the private sector, who knows? And if my education NGO becomes successful, I may actually be a net employer of teachers.
And if I get out of school, Fiolina might get a job as a teacher. Every year, she has attended interviews but because I have not had enough money to grease someone's palm, she hasn't been lucky. I understand that this year, the government will employ 8,000 teachers.
If Fiolina will not be among those employed, then no one will believe anything that the government says. Not that we believe anyway, but this will be additional confirmation that it's all hot air. The truth is that it will not add any plate of ugali to our table, or change my family's financial standing; I just want something that will keep Fiolina busy, a place that will give her the perfect platform to gossip – which is her expertise.
So, ladies and gentlemen, friends and enemies, these are my bold, grand, ambitious 2025 New Year's Resolutions. For those who haven't made any, you are free to copy some of them and let's achieve them together. Happy New Year to you and your loved ones - hoping they love you back!
