Mwalimu Andrew: Why my children will never visit any relative again!
When, last November, I released Sospeter and Honda to go stay with my brother Pius over the December holidays, and Electina to go be with Teacher Lenah, her bad hair in tow, not only did I know that I would rest properly, but I looked forward to their happy return at the start of this year– before schools open.
But from what has happened in the last few days, I should just have stayed with them. As a person who has stayed with relatives’ children multiple times before, I know a thing or two about hosting other people’s children. Whenever you host them, you become responsible for them. You take care of them, feed them, clothe them, treat them if they fall sick. And we it comes time for them to go back, you buy them gifts, and facilitate their transport back to their parents. You also send them with some shopping to their parents.
So, when the New Year began, I looked forward to Honda and Sospeter returning from Nairobi before schools opens, with new clothes, many gifts, and shopping for us. We expected them to come at least three days before school open. So, when by Saturday, just two days before schools opened, they had not arrived, nor had Pius called me to offer any explanation, I got worried.
I called Pius. He initially did not pick my calls, and only called me later that day. After the usual greetings, I asked him if he had put Sospeter and Honda in Msamaria Mwema night bus so that I could pick them from Mwisho wa lama market the next morning.
“No, they are still here,” he said. I was shocked and asked him if he knew that schools were about to open.
“I know, I am chasing some deal, ikiivana they will come on Monday,” he went on.
“But Monday is school opening date,” I told him
“I know that bro, but you are the HM so there is no problem or is there?” he said. I was shocked.
“It is important for the kid to be in school on the first day, it is not about me,” I told him. He promised to try his best.
One sun evening, I got a text from him. “Hey bro, I had told you I am following up on some deal, but it looks like the deal will take some time. Please send fare for Sos and Honda and I will put them in the bus tomorrow morning.” I was surprised. He was not even asking me to lend him money, he was asking me to give him! How was that even possible. What kind of host asks the parent to send money for fare? I called him several times, but he did not pick. “Sorry, I can’t pick call. Please send the money so that I can put them in the bus first thing tomorrow.”
“It is the wife who doesn’t want Pius to pay for their transport,” said Fiolina when I told her that Pius asked for money for fare. “Does Pius look like someone who would lack Sh20,000 any time? No!”
I ignored her.
In the evening, Fiolina called someone – I do not know who - and managed to talk to Honda. She and Sospeter had stayed home while Pius’s children went to school.
“Can you imagine Pius’ children are going to school and yet my son and daughter, sorry Tocla’s daughter – are at home working for them,” said Fiolina, and demanded that bring the children back home. I called Pius who never answered.
The next day, in the evening, Fiolina told me that she had heard that Pius's wife had sent away her house girl the moment Honda arrived. "And the house girl has not returned after Christmas. So, Honda is the house girl toiling for Pius and his family.”
She said that she would not sleep until I ensure the kids return home.
I called Pius several times but he did not pick. The pressure from Fiolina, on the other side, become too much and on Tuesday evening, I sent Pius Sh1, 500. He at first said that was enough only for one kid, and asked that I add, but on Wednesday morning, he put them on a Mwisho wa Lami - bound Msamaria Mwema.
I picked them that afternoon. To my shock, they came the way they had left- with only their personal effects; they actually came with less. Because when they had left, not only had I contributed half the fuel for Pius car to Nairobi - I gave him Sh 1,500 - I had also give out lots of food: maize, potatoes, bananas, and two chicken. They had come back empty handed.
"Your brother is not a bad person, it is the wife," said Fiolina. "Our kids perform better in school than his, so she is not happy with us, she thinks our children stole her children’s stars." To my surprise, Pius never called to ask if the kids had arrived. I did not call back.
"Thats the last time my children will go to Pius’ home," declared Fiolina. “Ndugu yako amekaliwa na bibi.”
It was not any better with Electina, who had gone to be with Lena. On Sunday, as we were following up on Honda and Sospeter, Lena, her bad hair in tow, brought Electina. It was clear it was not a happy bringing. I was seated in the bedroom when they arrived, and watched them from the window as they came, not talking to another.
“Huyu msichana wako hana tabia,” said lena. Fiolina asked her what Electina had done.
“Kama singekuwa mjanja, bwana wangu alikuwa ameenda,” she told Fiolina. “Hata wewe usipochunga bwana wako, huyu Electina atapita na yeye, sio msichana mzuri.” Fiolina tried to defend Electina unsuccessfully. Because she had not been happy with Electina, Lena too, did not bring any gift or shopping. She, too, had not bought Electina anything, not even a handkerchief.
That evening, Fiolina confronted Electina. She refuted all what Lena had accused her of. “Bwana yake ndio alinitaka nikakataa,” she said. We were so upset. “This is what we warned you about, didn’t we?” Fiolina asked her. She insisted that she had behaved well, but that did not stop Lena’s husband form admiring her.
“I will never let you visit anyone ever again!” declared Fiolina. So, when Honda and Sospeter’s case followed in a matter of days, we agreed never to send our kids to any relative. Any relative!
