In the past week while scrolling through WhatsApp, Twitter and other media platforms, you are likely to have come across a ‘kwani mimi ni mwanamke ’ (Am I a woman) joke or meme.
A Twitter user Andy Mwuguzi wrote; ‘me searching for scholarships for African students in Russia and Ukraine, "kwani mimi ni mwanamke ,’ accompanied by a picture of city being bombed and on fire. Another @undisputedessay wrote; ‘ati nibebe mtoto kwani mimi ni mwanamke [I carry a baby, am I a woman]’ tagged with a photo of a man carrying a donkey.
This is just a sample amongst many such rhetoric circulating online, some very vile and speaking to the deeper issue of gender biases, misogyny and the place of women in society.
“If you shared the ‘kwani mimi ni mwanamke ’ memes, you lack the moral authority to condemn the Forest Road sexual abuse incident (by the bodaboda). Subjugation and oppression of women begin with gender stereotyping and sexism. It is primitive to liken any gender to inferiority.”
Another netizen, Ahmed Abdul-Aziz, criticised the use of the phrase. He terms it as utmost disrespect for women in the society all in the name of fun, calling it an ‘unprecedented’ online explosion of misogyny.
“We now live in a virtual society and offline violence has extended to online, which makes it easier for people to commit violence without consequences,” says Cecilia Maundu, a gender digital safety specialist, in an article published by United Nations (UN) Women in July 2020.
She adds that while men are also harassed online, when women are the target the harassment quickly descends into sexualised hate or threats, which she terms as an overt expression of the deeply rooted gender inequalities in our society.
The most common definition of misogyny is ‘a hatred for women’, which might be somewhat flawed in today’s social context. In her book Down Girl: The Logic of Misogyny, Kate Manne argues that misogyny should be understood as the system that operates “within a patriarchal social order to police and enforce women’s subordination and uphold male dominance.”
It is this system that is now manifesting as online gender-based violence, having evolved over time and continuing to do so every day, from the roots of misogyny traceable back to ancient Greek mythology. While men are also harassed online, when women are the target the harassment We now live in a virtual society and offline violence has extended to online, which makes it easier for people to commit violence without consequences,” says Cecilia Maundu, quickly descends into sexualised hate or threats.
The rise of digital misogyny and the role of social media
According to data from Hootsuite, a social media management platform, there were over 21 million internet users in Kenya in 2021, and 11 million active social media users. Every so often in the spirit of ‘being funny’, one amongst these social media users will come up with a hashtag, make a meme or video, or just start a trend that goes viral.
Kenyans on Twitter, commonly referred to as KOT, is a well-known online force, critiquing and making humour out of everything and anything. Be it political, social, economic or religious issues, there is no topic that will be left out in this infamous online space. The big question however is; where do you draw the line between making merry and cultivating a culture of abuse and disregard for basic human rights, especially on sensitive topics such as gender?
Three years ago when the Moi University medical student Ivy Wangeci was axed to death in 2019, a section of netizens started a ‘pigwa shoka ’ (get axed) trend where they glorified the heinous act committed to the young lady, indirectly and through parodies shared online in form of memes.
There was even a song of the same title released barely a month after the incident. The artists were subject to immense backlash from Kenyans online and they eventually apologised saying they meant no harm and the song was purely meant for entertainment. However, the damage had already been done. In fact, the whole ordeal turned so distasteful that Ivy’s mother had to come out and “ask people to stop peddling lies about her daughter.”
“I remember there was even one Facebook user who shared a graphical picture of a t-shirt with a bloodied axe,” recalls Chris Saidimu, a teacher and a self-declared ally of the feminist movement. “To understand why someone would sit down and design such a vile thing is beyond me.”
Another example is the controversial utterances by radio host Shaffie Weru during a breakfast show last year, concerning the case of Eunice Wangari who accused Moses Njoroge of pushing her off the 12th floor window. In the remarks, the host blamed the victim for the violence, and had to apologise after being pressured by disgruntled Kenyans.
Today, there is a trend picking pace and amassing a huge following where people of like mind come together to propagate misogynistic ideologies, mostly men. An example of one is the hashtag Masculinity Saturday started by Eric Amunga, known to many as Amerix.
The twitter community who follow him look to him as a coach on ‘how to be men’ and many users replicate and share his advice.
One tweet shared by a follower under the hashtag reads; “Dear men, her feelings are her issues not yours. If she’s mad at you it’s not your job to fix that. Tell your sons this.”
Another by a user @FaithWangari reads: “Dear men, why would you spend the whole of your life trying to understand a woman, a creature which was created by God from your rib while you were asleep? Tuwache upumbavu jameni [let’s stop being silly guys]”.
A post on Facebook posted by a group calling itself Masculinity Saturday states; “An inexperienced farmer should know an old field is not hard to plough, but at the same time it doesn’t produce much. Which is why farmers of old practiced shifting cultivation, always look for virgin land. I won’t explain.”
These posts being the ones with a softer language, paints a picture of the kind of words used and things said in these discussions. Words such as “simp” and “white knights” are regularly used in these discussions to refer to men who are against patriarchy and misogyny, or those that support women empowerment causes.
“Men, never trust any man who takes the side of women in a debate. That’s a classic white knight and there is a pandemic of white knights,” reads a tweet by Eric.
When requested by Satmag to do an interview and answer a few questions, Eric declined stating he does not contribute to news stories any longer.
“There is nothing like misogyny culture. These are words crafted by soymen and feminists to shame men for being men,” part of his reply reads.
Other media such as podcasts are also used to form communities with misogynistic undertones. The Guy Code is a podcast available on nine different platforms including Google and Apple podcasts. The description of the podcast is “A platform for the RED PILL aware Kenyan man to have a discussion with his peers.”
The ideology of the red pill is borrowed from the 1999 movie, The Matrix. A blue pill represents a person who hasn't woken up to the fact that society discriminates against males, not females; to take the blue pill is to do the same. In the movie, taking the blue pill means remaining part of the sheeple by holding conventional views and believing nothing is wrong, while taking the red pill means waking up.
“…This makes The Red Pill a continuous, multi-voiced, up-to-the-minute male complaint nestled at the heart of the so-called manosphere – a network of websites preoccupied with both the men’s rights movement and how to pick up women…” reads part of an article published by The Guardian with the title ‘Swallowing the Red Pill: a journey to the heart of modern misogyny’.
Other ‘manosphere glossary’ terms and abbreviations such as; alpha male, beta, all women are like that (Awalt)- an assertion that women are wired to respond to situations in certain ways and that, more specifically, if given the opportunity, they will tend to behave as manipulative, abusive, sociopathic, destructive, drama-oriented liars; and Alpha fux and beta bux (AFBB) an alleged two-phase mating strategy in which a female spends her youth riding the carousel with the hot alphas before finally settling down with a boring but well-heeled beta (who, likely as not, will then get cuckolded and eventually be taken for everything he's got in a divorce settlement); are all terms used liberally in the podcast’s discussions.
The effects of digital misogyny
“Societal violence is often perceived only as physical acts of violence, but online violence against women is the most direct result of interpersonal violence and is the stepping stone from interpersonal to physical violence.”
Alfred Abuka is a gender equality activist working with Dream Achievers Youth Organisation. He believes that the biggest effect is self-censorship of women online.
“This is exactly what the abusers want – to take their voices away. Take a public figure like a journalist for instance, who self-censors herself or leaves an online platform after being harassed. That is not only an attack on the person, but also on the fundamental right to freedom of information.”
He also adds that online violence is a public health issue and the effects very detrimental, as it can lead to physical, sexual, psychological or economic harm, and erode self-esteem.
Dr Susan Gitau, a counselling psychologist and the chair of the Kenya Counselling and Psychological Association, Kiambu County, agrees with these sentiments.
“Just as what could be regarded as ‘traditional misogyny’ has evolved to digital misogyny, violence perpetrated online has effects that flow over even offline and physically.”
She notes that young people, sometimes people as old as 30 years who are yet to fully define their values and standards, despite educational, economic or social background, are highly impressionable and therefore prone to picking misogynistic habits, sometimes unconsciously.
“A good manifestation of this is the attack on a female motorist in Nairobi that happened last week Friday. This happened while people just watched on, some taking out to record videos and take pictures of the whole ordeal.”
Dr Gitau argues that despite the fact that the recorded footage was helpful in apprehending the assaulters, everyone’s first instinct in such situations should be to help mitigate the violence before any other action, rather than remaining indifferent to violence.
“In extreme cases and perhaps coupled with other psychological or personal pressures, this online violence morphs into physical harm, sometimes catastrophic; for instance, an increase in intimate partner violence.”
A good example is the May 2014 in Isla Vista, California, where Elliot Rodger murdered six people and injured 14 others with his vehicle, a gun, and a knife. While the victims themselves were random, his motivation was not. Before the attack he uploaded a video to YouTube wherein he laid out his motives: he was tired of women rejecting him and jealous of the men they chose to sleep with instead of him.
“While such extremist cases have not properly come out in Kenya, perhaps we need more research on this, there are detectable undertones of gender-based hatred in some fatal attacks on women in the country.”
“A lot of people, even some of my friends, view online violence as ‘not a big deal’. This even happens with the police to whom you are supposed to report issues of violence and harassment,” Abuka says. “The first thing in addressing this is creating public awareness, by the government and all other relevant organisations. To get people to understand that online violence against women is not any less harmful.”
Dr Gitau believes that addressing the issue of digital misogyny in our society requires a holistic approach, and requires dealing with the root causes both online and offline.
“This starts at the most basic social unit which is the family, but it should not stop there. We need to go further and involve education stakeholders, the church, community and political leaders as well as all forms of media.”
At the family level, parents should be more willing and open to share about their own experiences in navigating relationships, their failures and lessons learnt, as well as educate their children on the need to respect all people, their gender notwithstanding.
They should also avoid gender stereotyping, for instance like women saying they cannot pay bills or do shopping because ‘I am not the man of the house,’ or parents using diminishing terms such as telling male children to stop ‘crying or throwing like a girl’, as these are misogynistic socialisations and biases that children pick up as they grow.
Dr Gitau states that coaching and education on relationship and gender issues at all developmental stages of life is very important. She says integrating relevant topics in the curriculum will have a huge impact, as teachers hugely shape the lives of minors as they grow up.
“Take a child born in a family that has misogynistic biases or violence and disregard for women. Despite the child lacking immediate role models at home, they can learn about respect for all people despite gender and become gender sensitive and aware,” continues Dr Gitau.
Dr Gitau also opines that all religious entities have a role to play. Beyond preaching and quoting the scriptures, the church should coach young people on relationship and social matters, as coaching and mentorship is more critical for them.
“The media can also be used to counter digital misogyny. We need more positive discussions in these online spaces that address matters of social and gender equality. Having regular and consistent discussions on the same in mainstream media, and involving experts to talk about topics such as digital safety will also go a long way in achieving the goal of a gender balanced and sensitised community,” she submits.
