Tana River teen mum determined to end period poverty, stigma
Menstrual Hygiene ambassador Milcah Hadida distributes sanitary pads to girls and women in Tana River County in 2021. She says that in every 10 girls, four drop out of school because of depression due to mockery in the early stages of their menstrual cycle.
What you need to know:
- Teen mum walks with her head held high believing she still has a chance in life after stressful moments that involved suicidal feelings.
- She fell victim to a man who took advantage of her plight when she could not afford sanitary pads during her early menstrual cycles.
- She says lack of menstrual education among men has contributed to the rising trauma.
A 17-year-old mother of twins will next month sit her Kenya Certificate of Primary Education in Tana River County.
The teenager has missed the exam twice before because of pregnancy, a situation she blames on peer pressure.
After losing her mother early in life, she had to figure out several things on her own. She is the firstborn and has two siblings.
When she first had her period, she did not know how to go about it, and it caused her a great deal of misery.
"It happened when I was at school, a male teacher noticed, and instead of helping me out, she started caning and humiliating me," she narrated.
Her experience with the teacher traumatised her, hence whenever her menstrual days approached, she was scared and would sit behind the toilets away from other pupils or stay away from school.
Uncaring father
Back at home, she approached her father for sanitary towels, but he dismissed her. "He asked me if I ever saw him attend periods or even walk from a shop to buy the pack for my mother in her lifetime. It hurt me," she said.
Left confused, she sought help and guidance elsewhere. Most women shied away, hence she ended up at the hands of men took advantage of her plight. The lecherous men supported her, but at a cost.
"When I met my first boyfriend, he was working with the Chinese on this Minjila-Lamu road. He told me he was an engineer and would change my life," she recounts.
On some days, she would spend time with the man, who would give her money. Then in 2019, she got pregnant and had to quit school just as she was about to sit her KCPE exam.
“I knew it was over for me, especially when I registered to sit my exam in 2020 when my father sent me out of home for being a burden and I had to live with a relative," she says.
The man who had defiled her abandoned her immediately after she informed him of her of the pregnancy. It was then that she learned he was a casual labourer and had been redeployed in Lamu.
Suicidal thoughts
She became the talk of the town, with men she turned down their advances for the fake engineer mocking her in the streets. Other parents warned their children against following her path, branding her a prostitute.
"These streets judged me harshly, if I was not strong enough to endure their words, I would have committed suicide while pregnant. Don't even mention the number of times I bought poison and cried holding it in my hands but never took it," she recounts.
The girl gave birth to twins whom she has been raising single-handedly.
At some point, schooling had become part of her past. But the trauma she has suffered has made her take a bold step to try her lack and take the KCPE test and continue her education.
She walks with her held head high believing she still has a chance in life.
"I wish I had someone to help me early, but, still, I am happy that despite the image people have painted of me, my situation has inspired a difference in homes as menstrual trauma and period poverty has become an open conversation in homes," she says.
Depression and counselling
The teen mum narrated her story to hundreds of guests in Kipini town at an open forum. The period stigma champion takes her time on the weekends to speak to pregnant teenagers, giving them hope and encouraging them not to give up.
Together with others, she offers counselling sessions in Kipini villages and push for teachers and society to address the stigma and offer support in the war on period poverty.
She says men are sentimental in the war on period poverty and menstrual trauma. Lack of menstrual education among men has contributed to the rising trauma among girls, she adds. As a result, hundreds of girls are dropping out of school and getting married at an early age.
Menstrual Hygiene ambassador Milcah Hadida notes that more than 1,000 girls suffer menstrual trauma in Tana River schools. This results in poor academic performance, massive school dropouts, and early marriages, hence a vicious cycle of poverty.
School dropouts
Ms Hadida says that in every 10 girls, four drop out of school because of depression due to mockery in the early stages of their menstrual cycle.
"Recent reports by the United Nations Children's Fund show that more than 5,000 girls are out of school in Tana River County, that is very alarming and should be a conversation," she says.
Ms Hadida also notes that parents have ignored their responsibility, leaving their daughters exposed and vulnerable to defilement.
County Gender executive Abbas Kunyo notes that the county administration has partnered with nongovernmental organisations to involve men in the conversation on menstrual education.
This, he says, will reduce ignorance, and, in turn, cause a decline in the menstrual trauma by more than 80 per cent.
"We need this knowledge for the men, the mental support must come from men for the girls to get back their confidence," he says.
The organisations involved in menstrual education for men include Moving the Goal Post, Search for Common Grounds’ and Kenya Red Cross Society.
