Beyond spectacle that Valentine’s Day has become

In a world increasingly shaped by consumer culture, the impact of materialism on relationships has become more pronounced, particularly during occasions like Valentine's Day.

While February 14 is marketed as a day of love, the pressure to express these sentiments through gifts and grand gestures often overshadows the true essence of genuine connection.

In this era of social media, where every moment is seemingly curated for public consumption, the commodification of love has introduced a new layer of complexity to romantic relationships.

Valentine's Day has morphed into a spectacle of consumerism. From expensive jewellery to elaborate flower arrangements, the emphasis is placed on the monetary value of gifts rather than the sentiment behind them.

In the quest for the perfect “Instagrammable” moment, authenticity can often be sacrificed at the altar of likes and shares. Couples feel compelled to outdo one another, perpetuating a cycle of comparison and competition that detracts from the intimacy of their relationship.

The pressure to conform to societal expectations can strain even the healthiest of relationships. Partners may feel inadequate if they can’t afford lavish gift or orchestrate extravagant surprises. The focus shifts from cherishing each other to keeping up appearances, leading to feelings of inadequacy and resentment. Emphasis on material possessions can create a sense of entitlement, where love is measured by the value of gifts rather than the depth of emotional connection.

The influence of consumerism on relationships is pervasive, and originates mostly from societal expectations. In many cultures, including the African perspective, the value of love is often equated with material possessions. This mindset, perpetuated by the media, reinforces the belief that a relationship’s worth is measured by extravagance of gifts exchanged.

In the age of social media, the performance of love has taken center stage. Couples feel compelled to document every moment of their relationship, from dinners to spontaneous getaways, for public consumption. However, behind the facade of picture-perfect moments lies the reality of everyday struggles and imperfections. The pressure to maintain an image of perfection can lead to feelings of insecurity and inadequacy, as couples compare their own relationships to the carefully curated portrayals of others.

Yet, amidst the consumerist frenzy of Valentine's Day, there remains a glimmer of hope for genuine connection. True love transcends material possessions and grand gestures. It is found in the everyday moments of laughter, understanding, and unwavering support. A healthy relationship is not defined by how lavishly Valentine's Day is celebrated but by the depth of mutual respect and affection between partners.

Rather than succumb to societal pressures, couples can redefine relationships on their own terms. They can celebrate love in ways that resonate with their values and beliefs, whether through a simple handwritten note or heartfelt conversation. By prioritising authenticity over performance, couples can cultivate a deeper sense of intimacy and connection.

Consumerism has undoubtedly exerted a significant influence on modern relationships, particularly during occasions like Valentine's Day. However, beneath the surface of materialistic displays lies the true essence of love – a bond built on mutual respect, trust, and genuine affection. After all, the most valuable gifts are those that cannot be bought – love, understanding, and companionship.

- Christabel Nechesa Kakai is an accountant and writer who comments on social issues.