Men, too, suffer emotional abuse
Although male journalists are the victims of sexual harassment, their attitude and perception toward it makes it hard to break the cycle.
What you need to know:
- It’s clear that we still see social interactions from the perspective of male power controlling women’s lives all the time.
- Yet, it’s this fixing of men on the walls as posters of heroism that has pushed them to killing themselves.
My recent story headlined ‘Sexual harassment: Why male journalists suffer in silence’ drew a lot of criticism.
What, however, concerned me the most is the perception society has on abuse of men and women. Allow me to refer to a particular feedback I got on email.
“I can’t believe the nonsense in this article... I hear stories all the time of women being asked for sexual favours by their bosses in return for keeping their jobs. Or blatant demand for sex from job seekers... This is shameful reporting Moraa.”
This one made me shed a tear, given the number of men who have confided in me on the pain of having been defiled in their childhood by their relatives, house helps or people their families believed were friends.
Others have been subjected to emotional hell by their own spouses, yet they cannot open up or seek help as society [despises] any man who speaks out.
Our cultures have equated masculinity to men being superhuman. They are not supposed to feel pain at all. They are not supposed to cry. And so, to society, causing a man trauma is an impossibility as they are perceived to have no emotions whatsoever.
Violence against male gender
From the feedback, it’s clear that we still see social interactions from the perspective of male power controlling women’s lives all the time.
It’s also clear from the feedback that society has become so used to reading, watching and listening to violence against women that they can jump into action when such happens. But when it comes to men, they go back to ticking the boxes that don’t comply with hegemonic masculinity.
Yet, it’s this fixing of men on the walls as posters of heroism that has pushed them to killing themselves when they can no longer bear the burden.
We all need to remember that we cannot end violence against women and girls without stopping violence against the male gender. In this regard, I commit to a #FreeMenfromStigma storytelling series to help each of us see men’s issues as equally serious without judgement or stigma. Welcome aboard!
Ms Obiria is a gender reporter at Nation Media Group; [email protected]
