It has been a while since chama members invited me to their monthly meetings. I was therefore pleasantly surprised when I got a phone call from the chairperson to attend last week’s meeting. As you may already be aware, chama is a women’s only welfare group of which I am the only male member.
“We have called you here because we want you to talk about breasts,” said the chairperson in introducing the session.
“Oh, that’s great! Breast cancer is a main killer, we need to talk about how to prevent it,” I interrupted.
“No, no, no doctor, pay attention to what we are here for,” the chairperson said, looking at me sternly. “It is about breasts as sex organs.”
I reclined on my seat, my mouth agape, trying to figure out what this was all about.
“Yes, tell us about breast orgasm,” shouted a member from the back bench.
“Yes, how can we stop the sagging,” shouted another member.
“And we want breast implants to enlarge the sizes,” said the vice-chairperson who was seated next to me.
I stood up and waved at the members to be orderly, thinking of how to structure the discussion.
Breasts indeed have many functions. We cannot discredit the nutritional function of the baby and women must breastfeed their babies exclusively for six months and then wean them as they continue to breastfeed until the baby is two years old.
“We know that,” a member shouted amid laughter.
The other function is aesthetic. Breasts give women a figure and we have to appreciate the beauty that comes with it. Many women are obsessed with breast size but size does not matter because you are made to project a beauty based on your whole body structure rather than just your breast size. It is therefore fine to have small, medium or big breasts.
“I do not agree I think men like big boobs,” a member interrupted.
Studies done on what attracts men to women have discounted the theory that big breasts matter. Men are attracted by your overall body structure, your personality and your demeanour. They are attracted by who you are rather than what your breasts, hair, ears or nails look like. This is not to say that you should not take care of your body and look good; looking good gives you confidence, and it is important but it is not for attracting men.
The same argument stands for the sagging of the breasts. Never deny your baby the natural gift of breast milk for fear of your breasts losing turgidity. Sagging of the breasts is a result of multiple factors, not just breastfeeding. Hormones and age have a big role to play and at a certain age, it just happens.
Remember that sagging of breasts does not change who you are and you should not spend sleepless nights worrying about it. Just get the right size of bra to hold them up nicely.
I am sure by now you have realised that breast implants may not be necessary. Several women argue that it gives them confidence and boosts their personality. Well, if that is how you feel, proceed with it, but just remember that it is your overall being that matters to people rather than the shape and size of one bit of your body.
“You haven’t talked about nipple orgasm,” a member reminded me.
Well, the breast is indeed an important sexual organ. Men want to engage with breasts during sex because, for one, it gives them fond memories of their intimate relationships with their mothers. Secondly, they do get pleasure from manipulating the breasts. Some women have very high nipple sensitivities, while others have only dull sensations. Always communicate with your partner on how much pressure they should apply.
The more sensitive a breast is, the less pressure is needed to stimulate it. Those with low sensitivity may require biting or nipple clips to be stimulated. It is now known that the part of the brain that responds to stimulation of the clitoris is the same one that responds to nipple stimulation. As such, orgasm can happen with stimulation of either.
Members stood up clapping. I did not expect this, so I remained standing, gazing at them. The chairperson came to me and whispered that there had been a heated argument in a previous meeting on whether orgasms could happen from nipple stimulation.
I once again gestured at members to be orderly. They sat down while still murmuring at each other.
Daily breast examinations are important for the early detection of cancer. When detected in good time, the chances of a cure are high.
Prof Osur is Technical Director, Reproductive, Maternal and Child Health at Amref.
