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Why are ‘bad guys’ so successful with women?
A bad guy’s risky and impulsive behaviour also makes him look brave, self-reliant and successful.
Why is it that women seem so attracted to the bad guys? That doesn’t seem to make sense. Why would a woman choose to get involved with a man who has a bad reputation? And who’s unfaithful and self-centred?
Maybe it’s something to do with the way the bad guys dominate the world around them. Especially other men. They make fearless eye contact with everyone, and rarely smile or show their feelings. They’re hyper masculine, adventurous and bold. Strong, confident and resilient. They always seem to be spoiling for a fight. Full of attitude, secretive and mysterious, so that no-one ever quite knows what they’re going to do next.
And it really does seem that women can’t resist them. Somehow bad’s sexy, spontaneous, passionate and exciting. It’s hard to get a bad guy’s attention, so winning one makes a girl feel special.
They drink, and prefer women who drink. Perhaps because women who drink seem to enjoy sex more! They have a great sense of humour, and the better a man’s sense of humour, the more women he’s likely to sleep with. Bad guys are charming, and seem to instinctively know what a woman wants. So even though they’re dangerous, controlling and arrogant, they definitely get the girls.
Women often imagine that they can change them, but actually they can’t. And they certainly do have a very real dark side. Many are highly impulsive. And yet that doesn’t seem to stop them attracting one night stands. They often have obsessive personalities, and yet obsessive and controlling men seem particularly successful at finding long-term mates.
These days there’s a tendency to label unusual personalities as if they were some form of mental illness. But since they seem to lead to such successful love lives, perhaps we should think of them as alternative sexual strategies?
Because it’s not only the men. Impulsive women also tend to have more short-term partners. Sensitive and anxious women are particularly good at developing long-term relationships, and have more children than average. Perhaps that’s because women are generally more sensitive than men, and so being more sensitive seems more feminine and attractive?
Similarly, a bad guy’s risky and impulsive behaviour also makes him look brave, self-reliant and successful. And those are definitely desirable traits. Impulsive guys also tend to meet more potential partners. While on the other hand, obsessive males seem reliable and cautious, and tend to earn a lot of money, which also makes them an attractive partner.
So maybe traits like these are not actually the disadvantage that they seem. Because they also result in more partners, and more children. Which means that being different can be a very real advantage in life.
But someone who has an unusual personality can be very hard to live with. So think twice before starting a relationship with one. Because while someone with a dark side may be more sexually successful, they rarely make their partners happy.
