‘She let the towel fall and asked if she looked beautiful’: When male workers become prey
Amos* says a woman called him to fix her radio, but when he arrived at her bedroom door, she was standing in a towel. Moments later, it dropped to the floor.
What you need to know:
- A security guard’s experience with sexual harassment reveals a rarely discussed form of gender-based violence affecting male domestic workers; new data shows women employers are the leading perpetrators, as advocates push for Kenya to ratify key ILO protections.
- When an employer dropped her towel and propositioned him, Amos Makau* learned how vulnerable domestic workers are to abuse behind closed doors.
- With most survivors staying silent, activists are pushing for Kenya to ratify ILO Conventions 189 and 190 to ensure safety and dignity.
The woman called him to fix her radio. When Amos Makau* arrived at her bedroom door, she was standing in nothing but a towel. Moments later, it dropped to the floor.
“She asked me if she looked beautiful,” Amos recalls. “I went and checked the radio. There was nothing wrong with it. I told her I had fixed it and left the room.”
The children were home. So was the house girl. Yet the woman, a client who had previously hired him for odd jobs—pruning hedges, cutting grass—was brazen enough to make a sexual advance on the security guard she had summoned to her bedroom by false pretences. It was not the first time. And Amos knows he is not alone.
The job he loves, the harassment he endures
Amos always wanted to be a police officer. After completing his Kenya Certificate of Secondary Education in the late 1990s, he made several spirited attempts to join the National Police Service. None succeeded.
Dejected but still hopeful, he took up a job as a security guard in 2000. Twenty-five years later, he is still at it—and speaks of the work with evident pride. "I love this job very much. It has helped me take good care of my family, including taking my children to school," he tells Nation.Africa.
But like any job, it has come with challenges. Meagre pay. Poor working conditions. And something he says many of his colleagues experience but few are willing to discuss: sexual harassment by female clients. "Many other male colleagues have reported undergoing the same, but they are not bold enough to resist the temptation or speak out about it," he says.
Amos urges workers—both men and women—to remain alert to red flags. "Do not fall into seduction bait being thrown your way in your workplace. Flatly reject any such advances. Always cultivate a professional relationship with your bosses and colleagues," he advises.
He adds a warning: such situations can easily be used to frame someone for serious crimes. "It can land you in deep trouble."
A forum for the unheard
Amos shared his story during the National Commemorative Forum marking International Human Rights Day, organised by the Centre for Domestic Training and Development (CDTD) in partnership with Oxfam Kenya.
The forum brought together domestic workers, gender-based violence survivors, policymakers, civil society representatives, and labour rights actors. At the heart of their demands was the ratification of two International Labour Organisation conventions: Convention 189 on Decent Work for Domestic Workers, and Convention 190 on the Elimination of Violence and Harassment in the Workplace.
"We are calling for the ratification of these two international conventions to ensure that the human rights of domestic workers are respected and that they are treated with dignity," said Rose Awiti, a domestic worker.
Convention 189 offers specific protections to domestic workers, laying down basic rights and requiring states to take measures to make decent work a reality for this sector. Convention 190 recognises the right of everyone to a world of work free from violence and harassment, including gender-based violence.
Edith Murogo, founder of CDTD, called for urgent action from stakeholders to ensure safety, protection, and dignity for all domestic workers and the wider care economy—both in physical workplaces and digital spaces. "We need to look at the persistent challenges, from weak labour protections to technology-facilitated abuse, and emphasise the urgent need for stronger policies, better enforcement, and systems that truly safeguard care workers," she said.
Numbers behind the silence
Amos's account comes on the heels of a survey released by Oxfam Kenya titled Assessment of Prevalence of Gender-Based Violence in Domestic Workers Context. The study, conducted in Kiambu, Nairobi, Mombasa, and Nakuru counties, interviewed 351 domestic workers. Its findings are sobering.
Female employers—wives in the households—were identified as the primary perpetrators of gender-based violence, accounting for 59.9 per cent of cases. Male employers (husbands) accounted for 25.1 per cent, while employer-children were responsible for 9.7 per cent. Violence by co-workers comprised three per cent.
The causes are systemic: lack of recognition of domestic workers' human rights, unequal power dynamics, cultural acceptance of violence, and the absence of formal contracts defining working conditions. "Domestic workers experienced gender-based violence primarily because employers felt that domestic workers had no rights due to their choice of work," the report states.
Other risk factors include economic dependency, low awareness of rights, weak legal protections and enforcement mechanisms, and entrenched social norms. Perhaps most troubling is the silence. About 70.5 per cent of domestic workers did not report the violence they experienced. Their reasons reveal a workforce trapped by fear and distrust: 36 per cent feared losing their jobs, 19 per cent feared retaliation, 18 per cent feared not being believed, and 17 per cent lacked trust in authorities. Others simply did not know where or how to report.
The study recommends strengthening legal protections, rolling out awareness and education programmes targeting domestic workers, launching behaviour change campaigns on workers' rights, and improving support services and referral linkages. It also calls for better data management systems for tracking gender-based violence in this sector.
Government says ratification is near
Dr Josephine Obonyo, Gender Secretary at the State Department for Gender and Affirmative Action, told the forum that the government is committed to improving the welfare of domestic workers. She cited the National Care Policy, currently before Parliament, which contains provisions to protect those in care work, including domestic workers. About the ILO conventions, she offered assurance that progress is being made.
“We are currently at the tail end of ensuring that we as a country ratify ILO Convention 189 and ILO Convention 190. Public participation is ongoing so that every Kenyan can be involved in the process,” Dr Obonyo said.
Professional boundary that saved him
Back in that Nairobi estate, Amos walked out of the bedroom, past the children, past the house girl, and returned to his post. He did not confront the woman. He did not report her. He simply refused. It is a boundary he has learned to maintain over 25 years—one that has protected him from situations that could have destroyed his career, his family, or his freedom. "I could not understand how she was so daring, with the children and house girl right there," he says, still incredulous. "That was a major red flag."
He has seen colleagues fall. He has heard their stories. And he knows that for every man who resists, there are others who do not—or cannot. "Always be on the lookout," he says. "These things happen more than people want to admit."
*Name changed to protect victim’s identity.
