My cheating husband has threatened to kill me; what should I do?

Dear Vivian,

My husband and I have been married for 22 years. It hurt me recently to discover that he has been having an affair with a co-worker. When I approached him in a heated argument, he said he would kill me and remain with the other woman. What should I do?

Maritim,
Machakos

Dear Maritim,

Your safety and well-being are paramount. Your husband’s threat to kill you is a serious criminal offence under Kenyan law. The Constitution guarantees your right to life and security. Threatening your life is a violation of these rights and constitutes a criminal offence under the Penal Code. You should immediately report this matter to the police and file a statement at the nearest police station. Ensure the threat is documented and request an Occurrence Book (OB) number for reference. If you encounter any challenges with police responsiveness, engaging the services of a lawyer or gender-based violence advocate can help you navigate the process.

Read: She can have him; I do not want a cheating husband

Given the threats, you should consider applying for a protection order under the Protection Against Domestic Violence Act. This law provides safeguards for victims of domestic violence, including those facing psychological abuse or threats. A protection order can ensure your husband is legally restrained from contacting or harming you. Your safety is paramount, and this legal tool can offer immediate relief from the threat you face.

While infidelity is not a criminal offence, it can profoundly affect the sanctity of marriage. Under the Marriage Act, infidelity is a valid ground for divorce in civil, Christian, or customary marriages. If you feel your marriage has been irreparably damaged, you may petition for divorce. However, this is a personal decision, and you should consider seeking counselling to determine the best way forward.

Read: I’m ready to divorce cheating husband

The courts have addressed cases involving threats and domestic violence. For instance, in previous judgments, courts have emphasised that such behaviour is intolerable and issued protection orders to safeguard victims. You are not alone, and the legal system provides mechanisms to protect you and hold perpetrators accountable.

In the meantime, prioritise your safety. If you feel unsafe, leave your current environment and seek refuge with trusted family, friends, or a safe house. Additionally, organisations like Fida-K or a gender violence recovery centre can provide psychosocial support and legal aid. Remember, you have a right to live free from fear and violence, and the law is on your side.

Vivian

The writer is an advocate of the High Court of Kenya and award-winning civil society lawyer ([email protected]).