We’re burying our heads in the sand on matters teen sex

The reflex reactions of political and religious leaders when the question of teenage pregnancies comes up is always excruciatingly predictable.

From: “Jail them!” to “Castrate them!” to “The parents are to blame!” among other similarly outrageous sentiments, one distinct thing that emerges is the unwillingness to face the truth about sex.

And the truth is that our teenagers are having it and asking them not to do it is akin to asking a politician not to lie.

BETTER CHOICES

It will inevitably happen. So why not equip teenagers with enough knowledge to help them make better choices? Maybe even choices that will save their lives?

Our leaders know our teenagers are having sex. They know that children as young as 10 are engaging in sex. But as they seem to thrive on controversial statements, perhaps in a bid to stay relevant and newsworthy, they still prescribe questionable solutions to the problem.

Malindi MP Aisha Jumwa recently called for pregnant girls in Kilifi County to be jailed alongside the boys who impregnated them to “be fair to boys”. She didn’t stop there but also expressed concern that girls usually said they were cheated yet both took part in the action. The problem, according to her, seems to be the unfairness with which boys are treated compared to the girls.

According to the United Nations Population Fund, a total of 28,932 girls aged between 10 and 14 years were impregnated, while 349,465 girls between 15 to 19 years were in 2017. Kilifi County recorded 17,000 pregnancies last year. Obviously, throwing thousands of hapless boys and girls in jail in the name of fairness would be an exercise in futility.

SEXUAL OFFENCES ACT

In November 2018, Kilifi Governor Amason Kingi said he wanted the Sexual Offences Act amended to allow castration of men who defile young girls. While this would be a welcome solution to deter sexual predators, it would not in any way help the girl left behind after defilement.

Castration would not give her innocence or body back. It would not wash away the shame or stigma. It would not raise the child she would bring to the world.

Late last year, Education CS George Magoha blamed tumbling family values for the high rate of teenage pregnancies.

Given the unpredictable nature of teenagers in an equally fast-changing world, can we really blame parents for not being omnipresent in their children’s lives? In any case, these children spend more time in school than at home so perhaps the answer lies in the refusal of the education system to bend to meet the sex and sexuality education needs of the students.

SEX EDUXATION

But from the way religious leaders have been playing hard ball about the idea of sex education being introduced in schools, one would think that it was a curriculum on sex orgies being suggested instead of age-appropriate content that would go a long way in forestalling the alarmingly high rates of teenage pregnancies.

By avoiding the sex topic altogether, political and religious leaders only manage to train their guns on the symptoms rather than the causes of a larger problem; the country’s stigmatisation of sex and the conversations around it. As long as we keep pretending our teenagers are not having sex, and as long as we put morality and religion ahead of sex education, then no amount of jail time or castration will solve the problem.

Also, that Kenya is a secular state makes one wonder why matters sex education have to have religious influence. Especially knowing that religion is neither the only nor the ultimate place to look up to for pristine morals.

RELIGIOUS INFLUENCE

Needless to say, conversations about sex should be devoid of religious influence as this stands in the way of openly and freely discussing it.

The pregnant teenage girl does not need anyone’s judgement because long before that happens, metaphorically speaking, she’s already tried and hanged herself, maybe because she decided or was shown that her life was useless. And who can blame her? Especially given the alienation, stigmatisation and shame that both sex and pregnancy carry for her? Those who’ve felt the lashes of injustice that befalls pregnant teenagers must speak up above the rants of politicians and religious leaders.

The writer is the editor, Living Magazine; [email protected]; @FaithOneya