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Fashion goofs? No, we are just a different lot
Were I to listen to the fashionistas, I would be the last person to give you any fashion advice. With a wardrobe that is 60 per cent black, 70 per cent jeans and — you get the drift, no creativity in my wardrobe at all — I should be the one asking for advice.
However, just because I am not experimental fashion-wise does not mean I am blind. So here’s my two cents:
Last week, I carried two handbags because I had a lot of stuff to carry. The rucksacks were missing in action, and I will do anything not to carry a branded plastic bag. Well, ‘anything’ includes carrying two handbags, and so I did; red and black.
My fashion statement earned me a few strange looks; friends wanted to know what I had smoked, but I am not one to be bothered by disturbed looks.
So yes, it is tried and tested; you can carry two handbags, one slung over your shoulder, the other hanging from your hand. Or both slung over each shoulder, why not?
There should never be set rules to fashion — we are all individuals with different tastes, and being expected to conform is just wrong. I read somewhere that wearing a denim suit is a faux pas. I do not own such a suit, but I think they look rather fetching, especially on small bodies.
The only quarrel I have with this look is if the trouser is dark blue and the jacket ice blue.
The trick to any fashion anywhere in the world is to wear it with your head held very high; it confuses the opponent. International fashion icons like Victoria Beckham and Lady Gaga (yes, she is a fashion icon) survive by sheer confidence.
To most people, including me, the outfits they don look ridiculous, but the confidence they wear them with makes up for everything else.
Hunching your shoulders draws the wrong attention to yourself.
Do not look for approval from passers-by either. That means you need to get rid of that shifty look and stare straight ahead, again, head held high.
But, as much as I subscribe to the free order, you need more than chutzpah to wear sports clothes and high heels. It is rather bizarre.
The day I see The Eldoret Express on the track with high heels, I will perhaps change my mind, but for now, kindly stick to sports shoes.
Even Victoria Beckham once tried that look... and failed miserably. And if Victoria fails, you have no chance, my friend.
In primary school, we had a teacher who shouted ‘PHD’ whenever he saw a Petticoat Hanging Down (getit?). I wish this teacher could be deployed on the streets of Nairobi today.
