If you were to ask any Mwisho wa Lami businessperson how Biashara is doing, they would tell you it’s Mbaya Sana. This is because the people of Mwisho wa Lami village, like many others in Kenya, are known to take goods and services on credit — without any plans to pay.
That explains why Kasuku Hotel and Restaurant, and Cosmas Bar, have remained the same for as long as I have been alive: no change in service or menu, no new plates, cups or glasses; and no new coat of paint. The only thing that has changed has been the ownership — with most owners leaving on realising that people just can’t pay, won’t pay.
Yet, the sales are there, and there are always customers. The same applies to all other businesses in Mwisho wa Lami and beyond. The only business thriving in Mwisho wa Lami is Mr Maina’s Hardware, but it’s rumoured that he buried the head of a sheep at the door — which attracts customers and discourages anyone from taking goods on credit.
Even schools were not spared. For a long time, we were living in debt, with parents not paying for even the smallest things — like just Sh10 for funeral contributions. I know the situation was dire in secondary schools, but it wasn’t any easier in primary schools either.
So, when the government announced free primary education, it was a huge relief for parents. Unknown to many, the biggest relief was to teachers — especially headmasters — as it became a big motivation to grow and become a headteacher. Everyone wanted to manage school funds.
You see, parents had not been paying money, and we owed our suppliers and other service providers — including school cooks and watchmen. With the money coming in, schools became stable, and we could attract good people to serve on school BOMs (Boards of Management). But now, we no longer attract good people to BOMs — only greedy are interested.
But for the last few years, we’ve seen a trend where the government delays the money and reduces it over time, and now we’re in a situation where expecting capitation to come on time is like expecting water from a stone.
This year is no different — if not worse. For the last few years, these problems have become rampant. If the delays had happened a few years ago, it wouldn’t have been so bad. But they’re coming at a time when we now have Junior Secondary Schools domiciled in primary schools, and this has caused enough pain already.
To make Junior School work, last year we employed two teachers on Board of Management terms, to be paid by the school. This has accelerated an already dire situation. I know the situation is different for different schools, but for me, I meet creditors everywhere I go: BOM teachers, watchmen, school cooks, suppliers of different goods and services, Fiolina, name them.
To survive, as we waited for the money to arrive, I developed certain tricks to keep going. Here are some of them.
One of the easiest ways to avoid meeting your debtors is by being absent — especially on the days you suspect the creditors might come for you. I’ve learned to employ spies who know when they are likely to show up. And whenever I’m asked when I’ll be around, I indicate a certain day — then make sure I’m absent on that day. And when asked, I always keep saying I will be there in an hour – but I will go everywhere except school!
A few years ago, when I was still naïve, I used to avoid certain routes — especially near shops where I owed money. Over time, I got comfortable with debt, especially after I learned that even the government itself owes billions to China and the US. But that doesn’t make our president afraid. He still visits them to borrow to borrow more.
After this revelation, I started walking around without a care in the world — until I started having school debts. I know I shouldn’t worry too much since these were school debts, but I still carry some guilt.
If you ever call me and find that I’m mteja, it won’t be because I don’t have a network or my phone is off — it’s because I don’t want to receive calls from my creditors. I have no issues speaking to TSC officers; I can handle them. But creditors? That’s a different — especially when I don’t even know when the money will come in.
In the unlikely event that a creditor gets my main phone number or the other number I use, I politely receive the call. But once I discover it’s a creditor, two things will happen: either I will ‘run out of airtime’, or the network will start ‘misbehaving’. I will tell the caller that I would call back — then proceed to block the number from calling me ever again!
All these tricks only work with people I don’t meet often. Every day I go to school, I pass the gate where I meet the watchman — who I haven’t paid for long. In the staffroom, I see the BOM teachers, and I meet the school cook daily. The trick is to avoid talking to them. How do I do so?
The first tactic is pretending to be on a call. I am perpetually on a call whenever I enter or leave school. This way, I never give the watchman a chance to talk to me. It doesn’t matter what’s on the other side of the line — or even if there’s anyone there at all. What matters is that I look busy, so the watchman leaves me alone.
The same applies to the BOM teachers. I always receive a call whenever they approach me, and I stay on it long enough until they walk away.
If not on a call, I will always pretend to be busy. “I’m preparing an urgent document for TSC,” I’ll say whenever one of them comes to my office. “Let’s talk when I’m done,” is my standard answer when asked. I must mention that my phone is always on silent — meaning I can never ‘hear’ when someone calls. I only return calls to those I want to. None of the creditors will ever get a call back from me.
So, I would like to thank the government for releasing Capitation money a few weeks ago. I say thanks although we received only part of it. I cleared less than half of what we owe. I hope the government will release what remains, for I do not want to go through the same again!
