Marriage comes with additional costs such as increased rent, food, transport, emergencies, healthcare, utilities, and toiletries.
I live and work in Nairobi and I am 29. I have a public service job and I earn a net salary of Sh32,000 per month. My expenses include: Rent Sh9,000, transport Sh3,500, Food Sh12,000 (about Sh400 per day), Cooking Gas Sh1,200, Airtime & Internet Sh500, EPL Weekend Matches and Drinks Sh2,000, Mom Sh2,000, Girlfriend Sh1,000, Miscellaneous Sh1,000, M-Shwari Sh2,500.
I would like to get married to my girlfriend in January 2026. We have been dating for four years and I think it’s time to settle down. However, I am concerned about my finances and whether I will be able to support a family.
My girlfriend lives with her auntie and works at a mini-supermarket in the neighbourhood. She earns around Sh13,000 which is barely enough for her personal sustenance. She will be wholly dependent on me. How are we going to survive in Nairobi? Please advise me. — Richie
Chacha Nyaigoti Bichang’a, a financial coach at Chachanomics Consulting Firm and the author of Mastering Your Money
Your financial breakdown reveals that you have a budget deficit of Sh2,700. Your total expenditure is Sh34,700 against a salary of Sh32,000. You are living beyond your means by relying either on money borrowed from M-Shwari or other sources.
At 29, your concern as to whether the status of your finances and ability to support a family are valid because you need to lay a solid ground for your financial take off in your 30s. To address your pertinent concerns, review your expenditure, have a spending plan, evaluate your financial expectations, have an introspection of your readiness for marriage and rethink the timing, start a saving scheme and a side hustle.
1). Review your expenditure
Prioritise needs over wants. Cut off expenditure on wants or reduce expenditure on unnecessary expenses. For example, you are spending Sh9,000 (28 per cent) on rent which is more than the recommended average of 15 per cent (Sh4,800). Reduce this to around Sh5,000 by relocating to a more affordable house, and you will remain with Sh4,000.
Two, you spend Sh3,500 (11 per cent) on transport, which is higher than the recommended average of 5 per cent (Sh1,600). Spend not more than Sh2,000 by travelling off-peak and save Sh1,500.
Three, your expenditure on food is Sh12,000 (38 per cent), which is far much more than the recommended average of 20 per cent (Sh6,400). Spend about Sh7,000 by buying foodstuffs in bulk and set aside Sh5,000.
Four, you spend Sh2,000 (6 per cent) on EPL matches and drinks during weekends. You can either eliminate this unnecessary expense or reduce it by Sh1,000. Find something more productive to do over the weekends which can generate more income.
Five, reconsider reducing the money you send your mother to Sh1,000 and think of doing away with the miscellaneous expense of Sh1,000. Once you do as suggested, you will remain with an additional disposable income of around Sh12,500. Use part of this to clear the M-Shwari loan. This leaves you with a balance of Shs10,000 to spend on other necessary expenses like saving for the wedding and investment purposes.
2). Have an in-depth understanding of the budgetary implications of being a married couple
Your current income and expenditure can barely support you. Marriage comes with additional costs such as increased rent, food, transport, emergencies, healthcare, utilities, and toiletries. Post-marriage expenses will escalate to an upwards of over Sh40,000 plunging you into a vicious cycle of bad debts if nothing changes.
3). Have a spending plan for your money
Use the 50/30/20 to plan your money more effectively. Spend 50 percent (Sh16,000) for necessities such as rent, transport, food, gas, utilities, internet and airtime. Utilise 30 percent (Sh9,600) for savings and channel 20 percent (6,400) for discretionary expenses such as mother's token, girlfriend's tip, and other miscellaneous expenses. More attention should be directed towards trimming your expenditure on wants such as EPL matches and drinking, and miscellaneous. The budgetary framework can be readjusted to 50/40/10 or 40/40/20 to suit your financial goals and expectations.
4). Have a candid financial reality talk with your girlfriend
Create a mutual understanding of your financial situation by discussing your financial goals and expenses with your fiancée. Encourage her to upgrade her skills or start a side hustle so as to reduce the financial dependency on your insufficient income. Remember, many marriages break down due to financial conflicts arising from misaligned financial goals and expectations - a clear demonstration of financial incompatibility and infidelity.
5). Have an introspection on your readiness for marriage
Rethink your timing for marriage because January 2026 is barely one and half months away. Ask yourself these pertinent questions: Am I really ready financially, emotionally and spiritually ready to marry as of January 2026? Is my girlfriend and I really compatible or complementary? Can we build together as a couple instead of my girlfriend solely depending on my salary? If not ready, postpone your marriage by one to two years and focus on stabilising your financial base.
6). Establish a saving and investing scheme
Adopt a multi-prong financial strategy. One, start saving for your intended wedding (have 1-2 years plan) by depositing at least Sh5,000 into a reliable unit fund provider with modest compound interest. Two, do a feasibility study and save Sh5,000 in a stable Sacco for investment purposes. Three, do not go for any bad debt, but explore options for potential passive investments in the stock exchange, real estate and digital assets like content creation. Have a tentative budget for your wedding. Consider overall costs for the expected venue, food, decorations etc.
In sum, take your time to plan your finances and stabilise before diving into marriage. Avoid bad debts, build a robust saving and investment scheme, grow your income and build a mutually dependable financial plan with your partner.
If you have any money problems, send us an email at [email protected] and leave your number for contact. Money questions will be answered here
