Why are men my age so boring?

It is healthy to enjoy life when and if you can. I wonder if you have a family because that would keep you engaged, attending to house chores, taking care of your husband, and raising children. That notwithstanding, men your age have families. They're not boring, they're just too busy and have other serious responsibilities and can't afford to be free to meet your expectations. The young ones can warm up to you because you're financially stable, but will never be committed. Throw parties and date, but for how long? Age is catching up with you. Put your act together and settle down with a husband.

 D Mutunga

The music fades, and the mirror shows what the night hides. Beauty is a flame, but spirit is the fire that endures. Younger hearts chase the sparkle; older souls seek the glow. If you find yourself dancing alone, it may be life’s way of asking: “Are you ready for a deeper song?” Dance if you must, but know that true connection waits beyond the noise, in the spaces where hearts speak softly. Tafakari!

Freezer, Nairobi

You need to understand that life is in phases. Each phase comprises likes and dislikes for individuals and is aligned with age bracket, and as you said, it is very normal for people to change what they once had pleasure in as they advance in age. What you are doing is uncalled for because you are using those young guys to satisfy your pleasures. Kindly cooperate with nature and move with your age. It is high time you settled down.

Rev Geoffrey Avudiko, Senior Pastor in Mitume P.A.G Church, Kitale

You're getting older with less responsibilities that's why you have a lot of time to party, unlike men your age, meaning they are not boring, they just have a lot to focus on than partying day and night. The younger men you are talking about do not have much on their plates, that's why they have a lot of time to party and have fun, which fits your brackets. So there's nothing wrong with your preference.

Juma Felix

You can't eat your cake and have it. From your description, one can identify that you aren't interested in men or something serious, but fun and merry-making. Maybe the men your age want someone to settle with, and you want fun, that’s why you are getting only young guys who most probably only want fun like you. Check your priorities and align them accordingly.

Paul Nyori Njuguna, Embu

Dating dynamics are influenced by various factors, from societal expectations to individual growth. As you navigate the excitement of nightlife and relationships, embracing the possibility of dating younger partners can open new avenues for connection and joy. By challenging societal norms and focusing on shared interests, you can foster meaningful relationships that celebrate both passion and personal growth. Ultimately, the age of your partner should not overshadow the essence of your bond, mutual respect, excitement, and the desire to share in life’s adventures together.

Nyakenyanya Japhet

Women attracted to younger men may feel empowered, seeing themselves as desired by someone.  Additionally, younger men may represent less emotional baggage, offering a sense of freedom and exploration. It is a dynamic influenced by personal preferences, life stages, and individual experiences.  There is absolutely nothing wrong, there are many other women like you who prefer to have a younger partner. It is a give and take. They provide each other something they could not get from the same age group.

Fred Lastborn Jausenge - UAE

FROM THE EXPERT

I have read your story and it describes a woman who understands and knows what she desires in life, especially in the realm of having social fun. I can confidently tell you that there are many unwritten societal rules that are outdated and of no use in modern times. You will meet individuals who align with you, and others will not, regardless of age. Refrain from the pressure of dating men who are older just because society says so. It is all an illusion to suppress our social freedoms. However, it is true that as you get older, the pool of people with the same likes does grow smaller, which, depending on context, makes older men seek out younger, more socially flexible women. It is important to adjust so that you open up the avenue of meeting like-minded people.

Maurice Matheka is a relationships expert

NEXT WEEK’S DILEMMA

I love my partner very much. I believe he is my soul mate and I want us to stay together. But recently, I had a sexual encounter with a queer woman and the experience was so exciting! Now, I can’t stop thinking about her. My desire for queer intimacy is consuming me. Should I risk everything and share this with my partner, or should I just explore my fantasy in secret?

Are you facing a dilemma? To seek help or give advice, write to [email protected]