When Jacob Onyinge was growing up, his mother's ‘kabambe’ phone was the most prized possession in the house. He and his twin brother raced to grab it first, squeezing in as many games as possible before someone noticed or the battery died.
Years later, the father of three still plays mobile phone games with the same enthusiasm. Only now, he is not playing alone. His 10-year-old daughter and eight-year-old son join him for family gaming sessions, turning Candy Crush, Roblox and word games into moments of competition and connection. But as screen time stretches late into the night and cravings become harder to ignore, Jacob has begun confronting a dicey question – when does a shared hobby become an addiction that affects the entire family?
“When we travelled long distances, I would play until the phone was almost dead,” he says with a laugh. “The moment the bus stopped for passengers to eat or use the washroom, I would rush to find a charging point so I could continue playing when we got back to the bus.”
The behavior continued when he joined college and finally had his own mobile phone and soon, Jacob noticed that his love for mobile phone games was consuming much of his time, but he did not know how to stop.
“I would play until very late at night. When I woke up, the first thing I used to think of was playing. Sometimes I would even be late for classes, especially if I failed to win the game because then I would play on so that I reach my target.”
This challenge did not stop when Jacob got married. However, parenting responsibilities briefly forced him to put gaming on hold, until the birth of his second son reintroduced him to the games.
“When my children were young, I would rarely play because I was committed to raising them, but my son discovered phone games, reintroduced me to them and I began playing even more,” says the father of three.
Jacob has bought a smartphone for his 10-year-old daughter and a tablet for his son aged 8. They play many games including Candy Crush, Zen Word, Roblox, Bubble Shooter, Block Blast and Temple Run.
“The one I encourage them to play most is Wordscenery for spelling, which is my daughter’s favourite. We compete to see who gets more correct spellings between the mother and daughter versus me and my son,” he says. “My wife, daughter and I also love Candy Crush, while my son’s favourite is Car Crush. I don’t think I can stop playing mobile phone games.
“Sometimes she complains that our son is spending too much time on the phone, but I tell her to let him play because nobody knows where gaming could take him.”
“There is a game I saw trending online that involves depositing some cash. I tried it the last few days and I won some cash. I am still learning to see if I can make more money from it but I know that before you earn a substantial amount, you have to spend something, which is what I have been trying to do.”
Jacob believes that playing mobile phone games with his family has enhanced his relationship with his children.
“I know exactly what my children do outside school, their thinking capacity and how to help them build a winning mindset. I support and motivate them to be the best at what they love. I am not an old-school parent who only emphasises academic excellence.”
“My son overreacts whenever he loses. There was a time, when he lost, he threw the phone at the TV. My daughter is the opposite. If she loses, she only feels sad.”
“He started downloading games from my phone when he was only eight months old. I would give him a phone and find that he had already downloaded the games himself and was playing!”
Jacob and his family play the games mostly in the evening when his children are done with homework. Even though frequent playing has not affected his children’s academic performance, he admits that it is affecting their social life.
“I found the games becoming too addictive, so I came up with a rule that there are no phone games on Sundays. We go swimming, and because we have bicycles, instead of using the swimming pool nearby, each of us rides for a long distance before we swim for nearly three hours. We then cycle back home late in the evening when they are a bit tired, have dinner, play for a little while and fall asleep on their own.
“That is helping me balance their sports, schooling and gaming. On Fridays and Saturdays, we play games at home and don’t sleep until 1am or 2am,” he tells Parenting.
Hundreds of kilometers away from Nairobi, in Marsabit town, we meet Alex Haro. The father of one also started playing mobile phone games from his mother’s button phone when he was young, but the intensity increased when he got his own smartphone after joining campus 10 years ago.
“I am a fan of football, so I have football game applications on my phone that I usually play when I am bored or have free time. My son is two and a half years old but he can also play, so we play together.”
“Normally, I start playing at 9pm when my phone battery is at 50 per cent. I play until it drops to one per cent, then run to the socket, connect the phone to charge and continue playing until midnight when I finish the game. I then go to bed as my phone charges, but I still wake up at 5am as usual. So, even when I get to the office, I will be sleepy.”
“There is a time my wife was preparing milk tea and asked me to keep an eye on it, but I was playing a game on my phone. I only realised the milk was boiling over and spilling from the pot when it was too late. I paused the game, but my wife was really shouting at me. I went and locked myself in the bedroom and continued playing the game. I didn’t even take that tea,” he shares.
The couple does not have a house help, and Alex says introducing his son to mobile games keeps the little one busy and entertained while allowing them to bond. This also gives the mother time to attend to other household chores in the evening.
“When my wife complains that I am not helping with the baby, I take him and we start playing together, and he enjoys it. When his phone’s battery gets low, he takes mine. There are times when my son says he wants to use the washroom when I am in the middle of a game, but because I don’t want to lose, I call my wife to take him. She then has to stop whatever she is doing to help the baby first.
“I have never seen my wife playing these games. She only watches the funny TikTok videos. She always complains but I tell her that I started playing the games before I knew her. I have been playing for almost 15 years.”
One game takes Alex around six minutes but he can play more than 20 games in an hour and a half to win a trophy.
“That trophy comes with a sense of satisfaction. I feel relaxed after winning, and it helps me sleep better. There are also low, middle and high levels, with the high level being particularly challenging. Sometimes I play, lose and repeat the game, and even when I am tired, I cannot stop. When I lose, I feel bad, then I start again.
“Sometimes I want to stop playing. I have even uninstalled the application, but one day when I was in the bank and there was a long queue, I felt idle, so I reinstalled the game and started playing. It is the craving to just play. I always find myself opening the app and playing the game, even when I don’t want to,” says Alex.
According to digital techie Meshack Akoko, whether granted permission or not, children will still play games on phones because ours is a digital world.
“The advantage of allowing children unrestricted access is that they become tech-savvy at a young age. Some games, such as Minecraft, are also intellectually stimulating and have an aspect of group engagement. The downside is that gaming platforms provide perfect hunting grounds for bad actors who can end up grooming children. The games can also be addictive,” says Meshack.
“Children’s brains are still developing and not every parent might pick up the signs. Children also end up downloading all kinds of games pushed by algorithms, and some of those apps have malware used by cybercriminals.”
“Some developed nations have banned social media use for children. I think parents or guardians should control access.”
Paulyne Njoki Karuri during an interview at Nation Centre in Nairobi on September 3, 2026.
Photo credit: Bonface Bogita | Nation Media Group
According to counselling psychologist Paulyne Kariru, a parent playing mobile phone games in moderation is fine, but it becomes a concern when it becomes addictive, as in the case of Jacob and Alex.
“When you are in an addiction, you lose control and there are a lot of things that will go wrong. For example, this parent will not be there emotionally for their child,” Paulyne tells Parenting.
Phone games also cause distractions, and even though a parent may be physically present and close to their children, they may not offer them the attention they deserve.
“Sometimes a child wants to speak to you or call for your attention if, maybe, they are going through something. You can only notice when your child is overly quiet or looks agitated if you are not playing. Also, the father is the head of a home. He needs to give guidance to his family, teach children how to navigate life, encourage them and listen to them. Most of the time, children will do what they see.”
“Be intentional and set priorities. Is it the game or family? Set boundaries in terms of time and know how long is too long. Seek help from a counselor if you think you are addicted. Also, try replacing the gaming habit with other fun things. For example, you can board games with the family.”
